Being a listener in a nursing home

My name is Roman Kaczorowsky and I am a community visitor. I visit four people aged from 80 to 87 who live in nursing homes. Three have a Ukrainian background and one has a Polish background. Their names are Daria at Fairfield, Maria at Liverpool, George at Burwood and John at Petersham.

I serve mainly as a listener to these four people who tell me about their lives when young. George can even recite poetry by Taras Shevchenko that he learnt as a 17-year old and he is now 87. They relate stories about the trauma of the war years, which indeed haunts John and George to this day. Daria was sent to Germany as a forced labourer when only 20.

There have been some very emotional days when I felt flat and yet I forced myself to go and was rewarded by my mood being picked up by listening to details of the hardships from their past and how they came through horrendously hard and sad times. Judging from the farewells at the end of my visits, I know they enjoy my presence more than gifts of biscuits or ethnic newspapers.

I have frequently left nursing homes feeling better than when I arrived and I have done nothing more than smiling, sitting and listening for an hour and then shaken their hands. I have the greatest respect now for all the nursing staff who have a difficult job working five days per week.

I make sure I shake hands at the beginning and end of my visits. I have noticed that Daria, George and John hold my hand longer when I am leaving than when I arrived. This shows me that they enjoyed my visit and are reluctant for me to leave.

I am motivated by my religious beliefs to treat each person with dignity and kindness remembering the words of Jesus: "To the extent that you did it to one of these brothers of Mine, even the least of them, you did it to me."

As I listen to these proud people speak, I realise that my generation has had it easy. Yet they don't complain, they just tell the truth …

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